


God Lay Dead in Heaven

by whittler_of_words



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Gen, Ghosts, Homestuck Shipping World Cup 2014, Humanstuck, Sadstuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2018-02-06 10:56:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1855507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whittler_of_words/pseuds/whittler_of_words
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time you meet Gamzee, you’re six years old, and your dad has decided it’s time he introduced you to the park.</p><p>You’re playing in the sandbox when you see him. He’s on the other side of the fence that separates the park from the hills, underneath a large bush that kind of looks like it’d make for a super cool secret hang-out club. You stand up, brushing sand from your pants, and duck underneath the fence to see what he’s doing.</p><p>He’s sitting down in the dirt, his face buried in his knees.</p>
            </blockquote>





	God Lay Dead in Heaven

The first time you meet Gamzee, you’re six years old, and your dad has decided it’s time he introduced you to the park.

You’re playing in the sandbox, trying to convince the laws of gravity to break just a little bit so that your pile of sand will grow even bigger, when you see him. He’s on the other side of the fence that separates the park from the hills, underneath a large bush that kind of looks like it’d make for a super cool secret hang-out club. You stand up, brushing sand from your pants, and duck underneath the fence to see what he’s doing.

He’s sitting down in the dirt, his face buried in his knees. 

“Are you sad?” you ask, and he jerks up to look at you. You make a face at him. “Your hair is messy. You should brush it or your mommy will and it’ll hurt.”

He kind of just stares at you for a while.

“You look sad,” you say again, because his eyes are all red and that’s what Tavros always looks like after Vriska’s made him cry. “Did something happen?” 

He still doesn’t say anything. He just keeps looking at you. You’re just about to tell him that staring is rude when you hear your dad calling for you. You glance over your shoulder back at the sad guy while you walk back to the fence. “I’ll come back soon, and then you can tell me why you’re sad, okay?”

You don’t wait for his response. You duck under the fence and find your dad before he can get too worried about where you ran off to. You don’t tell him about the guy you saw. He’d probably just get worried, anyway.

\- -

The sad guy seems surprised when you show up the next day.

“I told you I’d come back,” you say, and you feel proud of yourself when he smiles. “I always keep my promises.”

“Aw, that’s a sweet thing to do, bro,” he says, and then you feel even prouder. “What’s your name?”

“I shouldn’t tell you. Mommy said not to talk to strangers.”

“But you’re already talking to me, right? And if you tell me your name then we won’t be strangers anymore.”

....He makes a good point. 

“My name’s Karkat,” you say, and you wait for him to start making fun of you like all the other kids do. He just smiles.

“Mine’s Gamzee,” he says, and you feel your eyes widen a little. “Nice to meet you, Karbro.”

\- - 

You go to the secret hang-out bush to talk to Gamzee every day. He’s weird, but in a good way. He always has the funniest jokes, and he talks funny, too. He always seems to know when you’re in a bad mood because Sollux is a meany face or Terezi won’t stop hitting you so _hard._

You really want your friends to be his friends, too. That would be awesome. So, one day, you decide to bring them to the park with you.

The only problem is Gamzee is nowhere to be found.

“He’s here!” Vriska just rolls her eyes while you try to find him in the small space underneath the secret hang-out bush. “He has to be!”

“You’re just trying to trick us, aren’t you,” Sollux says, and you push him.

“No!”

“He’s not here, Karkles,” Terezi says, peering down the hill. It’s more like a mini forest than anything else. “We should go. We’re not supposed to be here.”

“But he’s here!”

“Nice try, Kaaaaaaaarkat.” Vriska flips her hair like she always does when she’s trying to be cool. “You’re not gonna trick me. I’m not dumb!” She clambers over the fence. “I’m leaving.”

“But I want you to meet him!” They’re already moving away, though. This isn’t fair. “I’m not lying!”

“I believe you, Karkitty.” Nepeta jumps down from the tree she’d been trying to climb. “Maybe next time!”

“But I wanted you to meet him _now_.”

Kanaya takes you by the hand and guides you back out past the fence. She’s always trying to help you, and even if you don’t like it most of the time you let her, because she’s a whole year older. She’s nice, too.

The next time you see Gamzee, you are going to be so mad.

-

You were afraid that he wouldn’t be there when you got to the park the next day, but when you see him waiting in his usual spot, you swallow down your relief in favor of stalking up to him in anger.

His smile as he waves in greeting falls when you stop in front of him. “I hate you!” Your hands are in fists at your sides as you shout at him. “I wanted you to meet my friends but you weren’t here! You’re always here, why did you leave?! Now they all think I’m a liar and I’m not!”

You stop, trying to catch your breath, shaking because you are mad at him, so so mad. You can see him trying to think of something to say.

“I’m sorry, Karbro,” he says. He sits down in front of you so that you don’t have to look up to see his face. “I didn’t mean to leave, y’know?” He chews on his lip for a second. “I just can’t... other people can’t...” 

“Other people can’t what,” you say warily.

“I can’t really be around people. Y’dig?”

“Then what about me?” He blinks like you just said something super smart. Dumb dumb. “You can’t be around me?”

He shakes his head. “No, bro! You’re my best friend, of course I can be around you. It’s just other people that be harshin’ on the miracles.”

It takes you a second to realize what he just said. 

You’re his...

best friend?

“Woah!” He flails a little when you jump forward to hug him, but he doesn’t push you away. He goes really still for a second, like you just did something bad, and you stop moving too. You feel your face heat up, and you’re about to let go and run away when suddenly he starts hugging you back.

“Thank you, Karbro,” he says, really quiet like you just did something amazing.

“It’s just a hug,” you mumble into his shoulder. He laughs, still all quiet.

“There ain’t no such thing as just a hug, best friend.”

When you think about it for a second, you kind of have to agree.

\- -

Gamzee stops you as you’re about to leave one day. He smiles, and something about it looks weird. 

“Wait a sec, little bro. I got something I gotta tell you.”

It’s never good when someone older says that, and you feel your insides go all cold. “...Is it bad?”

“Not too bad.”

“What is it?”

“I just...” He swallows visibly. “I might need to be goin’ somewhere soon. I don’t know when, but I figure I’m sitting on borrowed time here. I’m telling you ‘cause I might not be able to say my goodbyes before I have to get goin’ where I need be.”

You can feel something hot building up in your chest. “I don’t want you to leave.”

“Me neither, bro. I don’t really got a say in it.”

“You have to?”

“Have to.”

You feel your eyes begin to sting, and you throw yourself at him before he can see your face as you start to cry. He hugs you tight, and it’s not enough because you don’t want him to leave.

“You gotta stay strong for me, ‘kay best friend? You gotta remember Gamzee Makara and you got to promise me you’ll do good, alright?”

You nod into his shoulder as tears streak hotly down your face. “Pr- promise.”

Leaving Gamzee has never hurt so much before. Nothing has ever hurt so much before, not even when you fell from that tree and had to go to the doctors.

Things carry on much as they did before. Until one day you get to the hang-out and he’s not there.

Or the next day. Or the next.

Or the next.

After a week of waiting, you admit to yourself what you’ve been trying not to believe.

Gamzee, your best friend, is gone.

\- -

As the years pass, you grow to forget about Gamzee Makara. Your friends and family say that he was nothing more than an imaginary friend, and as you grow older, you become inclined to agree.

It’s your grandma Rosa’s birthday, and you go down to the cemetery with your mom and dad to leave some flowers. You’ve been here countless times before, but this time, you notice something that makes you pause.

Is that a... bicycle horn?

You walk down the rows to where the gleaming metal of the horn caught your attention, and see that it’s in front of a grave. You squint at the tombstone, trying to read the name there.

_Gamzee Makara  
1989 - 2005_

_God lay dead in heaven;_  
 _Angels sang the hymn of the end;_  
 _Purple winds went moaning,_  
 _Their wings drip-dripping_  
 _With blood_  
 _That fell upon the earth_  
 _\- Stephen Crane_

_You gotta stay strong for me, ‘kay best friend? You gotta remember Gamzee Makara and you got to promise me you’ll do good, alright?_

You always keep your promises.

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a [GamKar prompt](http://hs-worldcup.dreamwidth.org/19475.html?thread=5310739&posted=1#cmt5729299) for HSWC. (I bet you can't guess which team I'm on.) (Hint, it's John<3Kat, woops.)


End file.
